It's 2 AM..

It is 2 AM and I am wide awake.   I would compare it to Christmas eve when I was a little kid.  I am excited to be joined with the woman I love.  Tomorrow Today I start the next chapter in my life.

Gasp a new post!

I have been a bit silent on this blog.  Mainly because I used it to convey meaning or elaborate on a feeling or just to get my thoughts out.  Since I spend everyday with the love of my life and I try to keep an open line of communication the need for putting thoughts down is nearly non existent.

Saying that I think I have come to a time when I want to put something down.  This will allow me to elaborate my thoughts with out getting the silly look. this is probably silly but I will go though with it anyway.

My love and I are Wall-E and Eve.

I was watching Wall-E yesterday (what can I say I love Pixar). While watching I saw the similarities between that movie and me and my beloved.

Wall-E is a robot who is odd, curious, lonely, beaten up, shy, and messy.  He collects odd trinkets and watches his favorite movies time and time again. I find myself really connecting  to him.  I know I am odd (goofy),  I am extremely curious,  I was very lonely, I am a mess, and I am very shy when it come to new people.  I watch the same Miyazaki Movies over and over and if you have seen my desk you know I collect trinkets.  He is a perfect analogy for me.

Eve is smart, stylish, brave, serious, and very determined.  She is on a mission and goes about doing it with dedication and skill.  She also is not afraid to enjoy a moment as we see when she just flies around enjoying the open air.  This is how I see my love. She is smarter than she gives herself credit. She is stylish and she gets complements on her outfits all the time.  She also can and does complete everything she puts her mind too.  Everyday I look up to her.  She is awesome.

Some how she has fallen for this rundown  goofball who doesn't have a clue at what he is doing.  All he knows is that he loves her with all his heart.   I look forward to the next time I get to hold her hand.

T - 588 hours and counting....

Scared.....

As the big day approaches I have started to bring together all my stuff. Life has been completely busy and in many ways been flipped upside down. Just reading that I get a bad feeling about all this. What is going to happen to the old me? How will this change me? Will I still have friends? Will I still have the same hobbies? Will I be so different from the man I was when we met that she will still be attracted to me?

It all comes down to how I look at it. I can look at myself as a caterpillar. Before I did what I wanted how I wanted. I consumed everything. (well I was a giving caterpillar so not everything) But I acumilated stuff to make me happy but really they just sat and collected dust. I kept video games after I stopped playing them, I set toys up to admire but really just collected dust. Most I just ignored. Sure a few has places of honor and I enjoyed looking at them (looking at you toy AT-AT, Star Destroyer and Blue Dragon) But the rest meh. This caterpillar is wrapping himself into a cocoon . Time to change.

Going from single to married is a huge change. I go from thinking only of myself and my wants and needs to having a family that I have to think about. My needs and desires are pushed to the back and the family comes first. This attitude scares me. I have been trying to think of reasons to keep my old toys but to be honest there is none. I will keep a few items (still looking at you guys) and sell or give the rest away. I have been fighting this. Scared of losing myself with all of my stuff but I now see that stuff was me. It is not who I am now. Heck, it is not even who I was when I meet my Fiancée. It is who I was as a child. It is time to move on. Maybe someone else will find joy in it.

I am not going to blank slate it. I will keep the stuff I am actively using like my gaming stuff. I have thinned down what I am keeping. I got rid of most of my extra stuff. I know I will need a hobby once I am married. Everyone one in a successful marriage I know has one. One guy has computer and woodworking, another tinkers with PCs, another works on cars and flips them, all my brothers play hockey. Mine will be 40k. When we first started going out my fiancée said she liked how I had a passion for something. Though I have not had the time to play much lately I still have a love of the game. I read articles and write blog posts about it. I think it is ingrained in to who I am. Maybe this will fade over time and more armies will get sold but until then it is still a part of me. I can relax and just paint or convert or read up on new tactics. Who knows eventually I will be able to get a game in.

There was a movie called Toy Story 3. Some of you might have seen it. I feel like Andy in that story. I am moving on and I need to find a new home for my toys. Hopefully I can find a good home.

What is going to happen to the old me?
The old me is gone.
How will this change me?
I hope I will become more responsible and with a whole lot less stuff.
Will I still have friends?
I hope so. I will not see them as often since I will be 350 miles away but I hope they will still be friends. (the internet should help this)
Will I still have the same hobbies?
I won't have time for video games or 40k at the get go. I will have my movies and if everything goes as planned I will get to do some 40k while we watch TV shows.
Will I be so different from the man I was when we met that she will still be attracted to me?
I really hope so. I can't answer this it is up to her.

So I am scared of change. Who isn't. But I look forward to the challenge of a new life. I don't have to face it alone. I will have a partner. So bring it on....

This caterpillar is ready to fly!

Living in sin... bum bum buuuuuummmmmm!!!!!!

As the days wind down (95 days till marital bliss) things are starting to happen faster and faster. Decisions need to be made and plans have to be executed. The big question that was making both of us worry is whether or not I will have a job when I get married. We have been bless to find out that my current employer has made arrangements for me to continue to work for them remotely as long as once a month I travel back here and work in the office once a month. This is awesome. The big shadow has been lifted and I don't have to worry about being dead weight in our relationship. This also solves an issue with my mother who was afraid I would never come home after moving to Ohio.

While all this was a big weight that was lifted a new weight has been put into place. To be able to remotely work from Ohio I need to be pulled off of my current project and added to a new project. I also had to decide when I am moving. Knowing how it is going from one project to the next I wanted to get on the new project as soon as possible so when the stress of the wedding and honeymoon start coming down hard I will not have the stress of a new position as well.

This brought me to a moving date of Sept 27. This means I will be moving in with Diana two months before our wedding. We will be "living in sin" as I told by my sister-in-law. I have prayed about it. I have talked to my deacon about it. I have decided that this is the best for my sanity, for our relationship, and our situation.

First of all. If we lived in the same area I would have no problem waiting to move in together after the wedding but that is not the case. I will be moving across states. Normally, I would have to find a new job when moving that far away. I had even started to look, I had applied to a few places. My company had told me it was a long shot that I stay with the company but God was looking over us and that long shot came through. So even though I am with the same company I still have to move and get setup in my new place. It doesn't make sense for me to try to find an apartment, along with internet that I will need for work, for 2 months. Not only that it would not be financially possible. I could wait until after the wedding and honeymoon to transfer over but we have already talked about that or I can move in with my Fiancée. I think I have made the right choice.

We are not "Shacking Up" or "Testing the Waters" as some might say. This is a solution to a problem. I have given her my heart a long time ago and nothing will change my mind about getting married. We looked up getting married before the big ceremony and when we did our Pre-Cana discussions with the deacon we brought this worry up to him. He said that while the church does not condone this activity it does not hold it against us. While that is not a rubber stamp of approval it does lessen my worries about my decision.

So in 31 days my address will change as will my life forever. I am excited to start this new part of my life. I am eager to work on the new project as well. God has blessed my life more than I ever thought I deserved. I thank and praise Him every day. Soon I will start this new branch. The life of the single boy, still living with his mom, will be over and I will become the man who has a family to take care of. I am scared but I have Him to guide me and my Bijou to lean on. I am ready to take on the world! Everything is coming together better than I ever expected. Life is good. Thanks be to God!

T- 95 days and counting...

busy, busy, busy...

Yesterday I was talking to my betrothed, as usual, and she made a comment about how busy my life is. Not really thinking about it I gave a quick response that if you are doing something you like, you don't really notice the hectic pace. While this is true, it is not the complete truth. The following is a taste of my schedule.

TUE Work, Dinner with best man, talk to Bijou
WED Work, pick up furniture, get items ready for sale at bazaar, talk to Bijou
THURS Work, Take items to bazaar, price items with workers, talk to Bijou
FRI Work, get everything ready for Sat trip, talk to Bijou
SAT Drop of Kelsey at kennel, drive to indy, got to DCI
SUN Church, Drive home, pick up Kelsey, talk to Bijou

And that is just this week. If I look at it from a distance I could easily get overwhelmed so I take it one day at a time. Not one of those things could be taken off the list. They all are important to keeping my life moving forward. The Bazaar will allow me to shrink my footprint and make it easier for me to move. The furniture will make our life easier with more space to organize stuff. The DCI stuff in indy is a chance for me to enjoy my music while getting a chance to be with my love. It is also my last hurrah with my mom so this trip is important.

So you might think that maybe this is just a busy week. I would have to disagree with you though. My life tends to be a roller coaster ride with a small break every evening to recharge. I think it goes back to the days I was very alone. If I ever had some down time I started to realize how alone I was and got depressed. If I kept myself running from place to place like a busy little bee I didn't have time to worry about being alone. I worked and played myself to exhaustion and woke up and did it again the next day.

Now that I have something to slow down for I am having a hard time putting the brakes on. I try to slow down. It is hard to change a habit especially when life around me is still pushing me forward. I just got an email from a buddy that wants me to go to a concert tomorrow night and instead of just saying no I have started to try to figure out how I can fit it in. Old habits.... I hope my hectic life does not hurt my relations with my future wife. I hope that she can help me slow down and relax. All I can do is pray.

Dear God,

Help me slow down and appreciate what I have. Help me clear time so I can give myself completely to the person you have blessed me with.

Thank you, amen.

As a great man once said.

"Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it."

T-116 days and counting.... we are getting closer!!

The Double edged sword...

From the day people determined that Monday was the start of the work week people have hated Mondays. For me the Monday after I get back from seeing the love of my life is really bad. For one it is the farthest day away from seeing my love. Since we live so far apart I use the weekends to travel to see her. So on these Mondays I am crashing from the joy of actually being with her. To be able to hold her in my arms and comfort her when she is sad, to be able to make a dinner for us or ease her workload (for example cut the grass/kill the spiders) gives me the warm fuzzies. I have at least a full work week till I see her again in person. Not cool. The countdown continues though, I have started to look for a job there and soon, I will be out there. The latest this will start will be on Nov 30. Until then, I will continue my journeys out there and skype with her every chance I get.


When I am out there though, I have a great time. We hang out, watch movies, make dinners, sleep in late, do chores together, help out at the church, and spend as much time as we can with each other. It is all we can do. We only have a couple of days max together so it is only natural that we seem connected at the hip. I am not saying it is necessary to fill all our time up with activities. No, I am actually a pretty relaxed guy and don't mind juts sitting on the couch watching a movie or talking about her latest magazine. What I don't have time for is my hobbies. Before I met her I was a pretty big geek. I fiddled with my PC, played games (both video and tabletop), built and painted miniatures for the table top games, and just hung out with my friends. Almost all of these I have put on a back burner to be able to spend more time with my baby. I do not regret putting these aside because I know I can pick them right back up where I left them once life has settled down.

I have not given up these thing entirely I just have suspended them until I have the free time to pursue them. The problem is my closest friends think that I have been told to put away my toys. This can't be farther from the truth. The sad thing is that the more I argue the more they are convinced otherwise. They just don't understand. My fiancée has been nothing but supportive of my passions. Not once has she told me to cancel a meeting or to get rid of stuff. The current purge of my stuff is because it has been gathering dust so I thought I might as well sell or donate it so I don't have to move it across 2 states to gather more dust. I think it is a great idea. This weekend I sold off a bunch of Anime that I had to clear the layer of dust off before taking them to the store. I was very happy that I got cash for all that. Hopefully I can get some more for my old video games that I will try to get rid of next.

In the end I just need some thick skin and let the naysayers squawk. I know that once I settle down in my new life things will quiet down and I will be able to work on my hobbies. I am getting married!!!! There are more important things beside painting up some army, video games will wait till I have time to play them, and my PC can wait to be upgraded (might have to fix it soon though).

T- 117 and counting... I am so excited!!!!

Love you Bijou!

Facing more questions...

Another week has gone by and the questions keep rolling in. I have had quite a few people ask me if I was sure that marriage is what I really wanted. The come in the form like: "You have to move where? Are you sure you want to do that?" or "Wow she is sick a lot. Are you sure you want to take that on?" or "Wow, your selling all these miniatures? Are you sure this is what you want?" 

The first word out of my mouth is "Yes" without hesitation.

I guess I am just a weird duck. In my heart, you know the one I have already promised to my betrothed, I feel that it is the only answer. I have always heard that I should follow my heart. I never knew that statement had a hidden clause of "only if it is easy."

There is no guarantee that love is going to be easy. To be honest I feel that love should be a challenge. If it is too easy how can it keep your interest. Sure there are smooth times they will be plentiful but every once in a while a speed bump should come along so you can take stock in your feelings. Re-energize you love and make you realize that this is the one for you. Without these speed bumps your love becomes common place. When that happens you start to take for granted the love you need to earn.

So, when asked, "are you sure you want to move?"

I answer "Heck yea, I want to be where my life will be complete."

"Are you sure you want to take that on?"

"Of course! Taking care of the one you love is part of a relationship. Wouldn't she do the same for me?"

"Are you sure you want to sell all of your minis?"

"Completely, I am going to be moving soon and the more I sell the less I have to move. Those armies are collecting dust and wanted to sell them a long time ago. This gives me the chance and a reason to get off my butt and do it!"

Are you sure this is what you want?"

"I wish I could make clear that I know what I am getting into. I have seen good marriages and bad, I have heard the horror stories and I am not scared. I have asked God for a chance to love. I have waited a long time. I have tried a few times but never have I thought this is the one. Until now."

"The woman I fell in love with is the right fit for me. When we talk about the important stuff we see eye to eye. We have had many similar experiences. We have a lot of the same worries. That is how I know she is right for me. That is who I fell in love with. That is the person I gave my heart. That is the person I want to spend the rest of my days with. I want to be there in good and bad, sick and health, rich or poor. It is a complete package."

"I know in my heart that we will face thing together. We are not 2 people struggling with life. We will be one united force. We will laugh, cry and fight as one and it will be glorious!"

and that is how I want to answer all those doubters. >_<

until next time...

T-137 and counting.

The hate game

I hear it all the time. "Doesn't she like us? Why does she hate the family? Is she avoiding us?" I don't understand where my family get these ideas. I am the youngest of 5 kids and have gone through the marriages of all my other siblings. Not once do I remember anyone of their significant others making an effort to bond with the family. The I only remember one of them doing a lot of interaction before during and after the wedding. I think that is because she was a high school romance. All the others were later in life when everyone has a job and a life and we are all busy. If my brother and his wife don't go to church at the same time and then doesn't go to lunch with the family it is ok because they have plans. But if my Fiancée doesn't make the 6 hour trek to do the same it is because she hates us. It frustrates me.

Yes I travel to see her more than she comes here but that is the way we planned it before she even left. We talked about the travelling and it is more feasible this way. She has suggested driving here and I usually reject it because it is easier and cheaper for me to do the traveling. My car is newer, I can bring items over to help ease the move in December, I only have to worry about myself when driving (no pet to worry about), and that I rather have me make that drive then worry about her while she is driving. After I explain it they look like they understand but, then the next week comes and she is not here and the questions come back. Are their memories that short?

I also point out that she is from a small family who is generally disconnected. They don't all live in one area. They don't have get togethers. Heck, she has lived there almost 6 months in the same city as her sister and you can count the times they have seen each other on one hand. So a family that Goes to church and lunch every week, has random get togethers for birthday and stuff is a bit out of the norm for her. She is feeling left out. If no one invites her to these parties how is she supposed to plan to come to them.

Deep breath....

Given time I think that my fiancée will become just another family member as much as any of the other wives have. I have a feeling that this is not about her not fitting in to the family but me moving away from the area. After I am married (or before if I find a job sooner than expected) I will be moving away so I will not be there every Sunday to organize our lunch schedule. I will not be there to do all the little maintenance on the house. They will have to step up in my absence. They have started to notice my absence because I travel every other week. So the family lashes out to try to figure out why I would not be there. For this I am sorry. I will miss the little things like Sunday lunch or playing hockey with my brothers. But I need to live my life and follow my heart. Right now my heart lives 350 miles away. It is hard enough to live with that pain.

Hopefully one day my family will understand. One day they will see the happiness that she gives me. Until that day I will endure their opinions defend her as much as I can and when the smoke clears I will be happy because I have found my soul mate and we will be one.

God Bless..

surfing the emotional waves!

This weekend my lovely fiancee came to town for another meeting with the Deacon to make sure we are prepared for our upcoming nuptials.  The meeting went really well we had a few questions which we got some answers to and we got our witnesses out of the way. My better half's birthday is soon so I took her out to a nice restaurant.  While she was in town she and her Matron of honor went dress shopping and talked about the wedding.  They had a good time and I think more things were locked down as far as they can be.

So as you can see it was a hectic weekend all that done in less that 48 hours.  I will admit some sleep was sacrificed >_< but everything seems to be running smoothly.  That is until last night.

We were tossing ideas back and forth suggesting songs for our ceremony.  We found that songs Define Dancing and the ending credits for Up might be a great option for the opening and closing songs. While we were doing that though I suggested the song Annabella's Song by Everclear.  This song is really about a dad and his daughter but I find it fits how I feel about her almost perfectly.  Here are the lyrics:

 "Annabella's Song"

I see you roll your eyes
You know it makes me smile
You are like the sun to me
Bright as liquid fire
I feel so powerless
To hold you up above the world
You are quite a lot of trouble
Such a pretty little girl
Such a pretty little girl

You know I'm never home
I'm always miles and miles away
I feel I'm runnin' out of time
Say the things I need to say
Call you on the telephone
You will not talk to me
Yeah you just don't understand
You are my everything

Anna, Anna
Tell me what you want
Tell me what you need
Anna, Anna, you are never alone
You are never alone

Anna, Anna
Tell me what you want
Tell me what you need
Anna, Anna, you are never alone
You are never alone

I like to watch you play
When you don't know I'm there
See you in your sleep at night
Reach out and touch your hair
I wanna make this world
Be just how you want it to be
Yeah you just don't understand
You're my everything

Anna, Anna
Tell me what you want
Tell me what you need
Anna, Anna, you are never alone
You are never alone

 I always substitute her name in for Anna. Just re reading it now brought tears to my eyes and if you add in the everclear style and I just lose control.  Right now I am miles away.  I know she is hurting and I cannot do anything to stop it.  I want so much to take all her troubles away and "make it how she wants it to be" but I am powerless.  All I can do is pray for her and listen when we talk and try to convey that I am always thinking of her.

So last night when I heard this song I just fell apart.  All the emotions from the last few days tied in with the void I felt since she left and the feeling of the song hit me like a ton of bricks.  I often will let things through but usually I will just tear up but last night was different.  I cannot say why but it was.

There is nothing I can do about this though.  Things will stay this way until that great day when I am by her side and we are together forever.  Until then I will still shed tears. All tears go away when I am with her so the easy answer is be with her more often, ^_^

159 days and counting.  just a few more days more than 5 months.  Things are rolling now.

Giving and taking...

Since we are seperated by 350 miles, my Fiancee and I talk a lot.  Most of my evenings, you can find me sitting in front of my PC skyping with the love of my life.  We talk about the upcoming wedding,  how our days were, plans for the weekend,   and just general stuff.  I will look at the clock and see that hours have past even though it seems like only minutes.

The Pressure is Building.

Looking at my app I have 193 days until the wedding.  I am getting very excited.  This weekend I went to be with my love and we watched Star Trek.   Awesome movie. While I was there, we also watched one of her favorite movies that  I have never seen, The Wedding Singer.

less than 200 days...

While time seams to creep on by, Some how we have reach the 200 days till the wedding mark. I am getting excited and while this is a great time for me. This weekend was the toughest one.  My betrothed went home to visit her Mom and I didn't want to disrupt their quality time so I tried to hold back from texting her.

the rough draft of our story

Once upon a time, there was a beautiful princess who left her castle to get away from an evil wizard. Our princess decided she needed to move to a faraway land to escape the clutches of the evil wizard and made plans to do so.  While waiting for her plans to be finalized, she met with other so called princes hoping to find her prince charming. These other men were not princes, they were fowl creatures who wasted the princess's time. 

On the day she found out she was heading to the land far away she met the town fool.  He seemed nice and funny.  Our princess told the fool of her plans on moving and he accepted this fate and wanted to make her last few days in the land merry.

So our princess and her fool enjoyed their time together. They laughed and dined and maid their days merry.  Little did they know, they were falling in love.  The more time they spent together, the sadder they got because the princess had to go far away. 

On the day she left, both had shed tears, but the fool was not an ordinary fool.  He got on his steed and followed the princess to the far away land.  Here, he proposed to the princess and right before her eyes transformed into her prince charming. She agreed to marry him.

This is the start of their happily ever after. This will be their wedding.    Please, come and join the festivities.

this could probably be fleshed out if I thought short and sweet would be good.  Let me know what you think and any errors that need to be corrected.

Love ya

Pre Cana

Going into last weekend I was a bit nervous about Pre Cana classes.  While reading several mixed reviews across the board everyone that I knew that did it said it whould bring out doubts or make me queasy.  I went into this day expecting facing hard questions.  How wrong I was.

No some would say I was just spinning things and not taking serious the topics that were being brought up but I say your people don't know me. I took everything they said serious (except maybe the parenting part).  Not once did I deny anything said and proclaim "that couldn't happen to us" What I did do is take everything to heart.  I answered every question truthfully.  What came out of it was what I have figured out a while back.

Me and My Fiancee are on the same page.  Being mature adults with developed pesonalities and traits we know what we want and what we can do.  We both state our minds and talk about everything.  I am not saying we don't have fears.  The fear she has given me is that she is afraid I will lose interest and someone else will steal me away from her.  I fear I will not be able to satisfy her and she will get bored with me. Both fears are legit but I think knowing them will help us dispell them.  I don't think I could ever do enough to squash her fear so I just have to stay vigilant and make sure she know she is my one and only.  With my fear i just need to keep at it.  Don't take things for granted and make sure her needs and desires are met.  easy peasy >_<

Over all it was a nice weekend.  I spent the whole day with her and we got to solidify our love with each other.  We had a nice lunch and a well intentioned meal (dang those green beans were good).  All for 50 buck.  Money well worth spent.  That is what the sushi meal cost the night before... I would take Pre Cana over that any day ^_^

Next up, assessment review with the Deacon.  Bring it on!! We are ready!

Team PDA FTW!

simple registry

I set up a registry at simpleRegestry.com

https://www.simpleregistry.com/wedding/account/registry/inventory.php#nogo

let me know if you can get to it

Save the Date

Wedding Save the Date Cards by Vistaprint

Big Weekend!

This weekend I proposed to my special girl.  It is a very special moment for me.  I tried to come up with something to make it special. 

I first thought about using a big screen at the movie theater but I didn't know the movie places very well and I think that it would have been out of my budget. Next I thought I would take her to a fancy french restaurant but then she said she didn't want to go there.  So I looked and looked for some place romantic in Dayton.  The only place I found was the Cox Arboretum.

They said they were having a Orchid show so I thought they would have a big room filled with all kinds of orchids.  I thought that it would be romantic proposing while surrounded by flowers.... unfortuantly their "Show" consisted of 10 or so small displays in a 15 X15 room.. not very romantic.  What Is did notice is that they have a pavilion that over looked a small ponds.

So we took a small walk up a path in the bitter cold.  While we walk I recounted our first few dates. I told her how when I saw her for the first time I noticed her smile and even though she told me she was moving soon I wanted to get to know her.

On our second date we actually got to know each other.  We went to Buffalo Wild Wings and sat for hours just talking. When I walked her to her car that night I wanted to hug her but I was too chicken. 

The third date was another movie.  After the movie while driving home she was telling me how cold her nose was and then took my hand and touched it to her nose.  I was still holding her hand when we brought it down and I never wanted to let it go.  Again I chickened out on the hug... But I knew I was falling for this girl.  I knew she was something special.

Our forth date was a concert. I found the courage to hold her hand and put arm around her. "It was to stay close" I told my self.  The night ended with me taking her home.  We sat and talk for a while in the car then I walked her to the door.  I built up the courage to hug her.... that hug turn into a kiss and I knew that I loved her.

By this time I was near the top of the path. I reached into my pocket and took out the ring and asked if she would be my wife. She said yes and now we are truly engaged.

I love her so much.  I think about her every day and can't wait till I am with her for good.  I owns my heart and keeps it there in Dayton with her.  I know because I have a hole in my chest that hurts when I am not with her.

just a link for me

my countdown

A letter to a friend,

The following is a letter to a friend of mine.  He has been married longer than I have been alive.  I think they have a wonderful marriage.  It is not perfect but if anyone has gotten close to perfection they have.  I hope in the coming years I can be like Marty.  I want to love my wife like he does,  I want to serve my wife like he does, and I want to feel as loved by his wife as he does.  Enjoy:


Thanks Marty,

I do understand that marriage is not the end of the race but only the beginning.  Dating is only the streching before the race.  light work a little tense you feel for what you can do.  I have been told this week that marriage is a marathon. I can understand that.  I don't have any delusions that it will just like dating all the time.  I know that this intesity will die down.  To be honest I am looking forward to it. 

I look forward to the times when we can just be.  I am not looking for some one to date the rest of my life.  I want someone who I can share my joys and pains with.  Some one who I can talk to, hash out problems with, pray with, and cry with.

I feel at peace with her.   I feel connected to her spiritually. I think God has given me a chance at true happiness with her and I am going to take it.

There are movies that she doesn't like to see so if you would want to see them we can go.  Marty thank you for being a friend. Thank you for always being a blessing.  Your words and friendship mean the world to me

Bless you

Andy

My list to start things out

I guess the first thing I should do is start making out a checklist of the things that need to be done. Of course this list is just from my perspective and probably missing a ton of details but it is a starting point.  Lets start from the beginning.

My first post

Hello all,

 

I have decided to start a blog about the love of my life and ultimately the planning of our marriage. I plan on using this as a sort of collection for my thoughts.  This way I can clear my head to think of other things and my friends can see what I am thinking.

 

So welcome to the site.  sit back, relax and enjoy my ramblings