Blessed

Time flies when you are having fun.  If you look away for what seems to be a second years have gone by.  I still think of my self as that shy kid that doesn't want to do anything and is content living out his life in this small town.  Still living with his mom, living paycheck to paycheck not looking past the weekend.  Then I realize that man-child no longer exists.  Sure I still play games and look forward to the weekend but my life has changed.

My Wife

As my wife has pointed out, it has been some time since I created a post here.  It is odd how life can seem full and exhausting while I still feel that not much has happened.

My life is very busy,  I spend most of my day either driving or working.  I have to cram my life into the evenings where I can watch a movie, do some hobby work, or do the dreaded homework. I do these things with my lovely wife at my side.

God bless this woman.  She is my rock in the storm.  She always listens to me.  Whether it is a crazy dream, a problem at work, an battle report, or just a stupid, groan worthy pun.  I have not had anyone in my life that would give me such attention.  She helps me quell my fears, she takes worries away so I can relax, and best of all she is someone I can be silly with.

We have so many inside jokes. With just a glance from me we both know what the other is thinking and we start giggling.  It is strange how much we think alike.  I will get an idea and before I even can tell her she is telling me the same idea. It is incredible.

I know I owe her a bunch of foot rubs.  I don't know what my life would be without her.  I do know that with her I can do almost anything.

Love ya honey.

Year two!

That's right! I blink and it is year two.  It is amazing how life just zooms on past not letting you catch your breath.

Babies!

Now that I have been married for a while the question I get is, "When are you two going to have kids?" That is a very loaded question. 

Where is the Passion?

After a month of being here in DC, I took a step back and looked at the life that we are living here.  We both are working out of the home.  Nights are generally eat supper, watch some TV, head to bed.  Weekends are full of shopping for the next week and trying to catch up on sleep.  Some might ask "Where is the passion? Where is the Fun?" I would answer they are not looking close enough.

My first year

On the eve of my anniversary I thought would try to write out how I feel about being married. I think I should start out with saying that I really had no clue about what this was going to be like.   I have had girlfriends and roommates and I lived with my mom for most of my life.  All I knew was that this would be different.

I think I have grown as a person. I think I have become more responsible.  I take time out of my day to think about different chores around the house that need to get done.  Things that I would ave taken for granted when living with my mom. (Sorry mom) While I don't have a set schedule I do load the dish washer, wash clothes, make lunches and supper way more often that I ever thought possible. It shocks me that those things would have ever entered into my mind. So big change number 1 I do housework! shocking.

While growing up, I was always amazed on how my bed looks like a tornado came through and destroyed my bed in the morning.  I always worried about my wife.  I used to think how can anyone sleep with the whirling dervish that I am.  I know, at first, I had a hard time sleeping  worrying about her safety.  But I slowly got used to it.  She hasn't complained about it and we went from a king down to a queen and still very few problems.  It is usually my sleep talking that bugs her.  My mom used to tell me about whole conversations I had with her while I slept. It is always funny to hear what my subconscious wants to talk about.

The one thing I was not ready for after saying "I do"  is all the emotions and how much further my love grows.  I thought that I loved my wife that day last year.  I thought "Man how can I love this woman any more than I do now?" Little did I know how self centered I was then. Back then I was in love with another person. We were 2 people. She did her stuff and I did mine.  When thinking about stuff I always thought "I can do this. This is what I want" It was all about the "Andy".  While I still have an 'I' to think about I catch myself asking "What shoud we do? What is best for us? We can do this. This is what we like."

I still have my own hobbies but for the most part I am thinking about the team. My love for her might not have gotten bigger but it hasgrown deeper.  my love for her has gotten to my very core. In most places she has become the first prority.  While not totally dependant on her, I am only really happy when she is. When she is bummed I get bummed. When she is happy, I live in her joy. I never thought I would ever feel this way about anyone.

My heart is not the only thing that has grown. My brain has changed.  I never thought that I would ever meet someone who thinks like I do.  It is scary sometimes when I am thinking something and she says it.  It is like there is a link between us.  I don't know if this is how it is with all couples but dang, it is weird sometimes.  Sometimes I apologize for doing something only to find out she would have done the same thing or she wanted me to do it.  We laugh about how we share this one brain.

I know there are other things that have changed but these are the ones that came to mind. Over all I can't believe it has been a year.  They say time flies when you are having fun.  Well I am having a blast.  I hope my love can continue to change and become more entwined as we embark on our next adventure.  Look out Washington! Here comes Team PDA!

I love you darling! God Bless! 

Travelling

This week I had to go back to IL to work for a few days.  It is the typical every few weeks thing I have had since I moved out to Ohio.  I have done it for a while now so you would think I would be used to the feelings that come with this traveling.  You would be wrong.

For some reason every time I leave my wife I feel sad and ashamed.  Like I am abandoning her. I leave but my heart stays and calls back to me. It whispers to me keeping me awake at night waking me up early in the morning telling me to come back home early.  So, I would long shift and finagle the times I leave and don’t stay one moment longer than I have to. 

This week is a bit different. My brothers said they wanted to get some quality time together since I am not usually around but then 2 dropped out and instead of a brother outing I went and saw a movie that was not on my list of movies to see with my mom, brother and his two daughters.  I could have slept in. I could have spent a nice day with my wife before driving to IL but no I had to get here to spend quality time with my brothers.

What really pisses me off I am in town and they aren’t even trying to make up for the cancelation.  After all the guilt and name calling they were just using me to fill out a foursome for golf.  Another pain I get to carry.

Every night I pray that God looks over my wife while I am away.  Before I fall asleep, I worry that she is mad or disappointed that I am not coming home sooner. I worry about her all the time.  I a shmuck like me got this awesome wife. Who stands by me and understands the pressures I have and does not give me one ounce of guilt over leaving her.  She is an angel.

So I need to work hard. Finish up what I have here and get on the road as fast as I can.  I want to have her in my arms as soon as possible.

I love you dear!